Guilty Pleasures

I like to think of myself as an intelligent, focused, and successful woman.  So guilty pleasures don't always fit in my model of who I think I should be.  For the sake of this argument, I'm defining a guilty pleasure as something that I would not offer as information to someone whom I have just met.  For some people, they love pro wrestling, for others tabloids, and others love video games.  Who says these things are wrong if you love to do them?

The truth?  I LOVE romance novels!!!  There I said it. I love the formula of girl meets boy, boy annoys and intrigues girl, conflict ensues, and they triumph together.  I don't have to wonder if I'm going to feel good at the end of the story - I know I'll feel good.

When I'm stressed or I am facing a big life transition, my go to is romance novels.  These novels calm me down and get me out of my own story.  I get to think about people who often fear love but decide to fall nevertheless.  My favorite trilogy of all time is Nora Roberts Three Sisters Island Trilogy.  Now, I happen to enjoy magic and the idea of it.  If you have a problem with it (you were against reading Harry Potter) don't even think about reading this trilogy.  If you do enjoy a little magic and romance, you can thank me later.

Let me know what you think!

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Laughing Matters

There are times that I just need to laugh.  I'm hoping you agree with me that levity sure does make life easier - and creates memories that last for years!  Do you have a great laughter filled memory where you laughed so hard you couldn't catch your breath?

I remember times like these and they often become inside jokes.  For example, a very wonderful and dear friend of mine and I were going to a wedding of another friend.  As we drove from the city to the suburbs, we spotted a hot man driving a car (we were both single), so we were playfully trying to catch up with him.  When we did, he was picking his nose.  That started the hilarity - but that's not where it ended.  It turns out, when we happened to catch up with him again, that we knew him! He was also attending the wedding because he was a great friend of the groom whom we had known for years.  Plus, my friend had had a crush on him over a decade prior.  Awesome!  The profile didn't give him away, and the nose picking was very distracting.  We almost had to pull over from laughing so hard.  Later that night, we joked often about "digging for gold" and couldn't stop the giggles.

Real moments with surprises are often what make me laugh - and I love to laugh.  May your day be filled with many real moments, delightful surprises, and tear-filled laughter!!!

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Life Happens

I swear I'm not going to go on about my cat in this blog.  I am, however, going to share with you that life and work can intermingle.  I was up for a gig testing a skin care product that I really believe in, and I couldn't make it to the audition because of the things going on with my cat.  I prepared myself for ridicule from the casting director and was pleasantly surprised to find support.

You see, we all have lives that keep going whether or not we pursue careers.  This CD had, in fact, lost a dear creature not that long ago and could appreciate my situation.  Plus, my puffy eyes would not make for a good skin care representative. 

The bottom line is I learned I can be honest about my life and still have support.  I realize this, too, was a gift from my fuzzy love - his parting gift.  Loving is not something to apologize for, it's something to celebrate.

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Remedies for Swollen Eyes

1. Cool washcloth with frozen peas on the eyes and forehead whilst you recline
2. Cucumber slices directly on the eyes
3. I haven't tried this, but hear Preparation H is fantastic.  Be very careful not to get it IN your eye.
4. Moisten two tea bags in cold water, chill them in the refrigerator and place them over closed eyelids for several minutes (compliments of Puffy Eyes)
5. Tap around your eyes from the nose outward to inspire fluid drainage
6. Saturate cotton balls with chilled witch hazel to use as a cold compress (suggests Kay Dean) 
7. Freezing a metal spoon and laying it on your eyes (suggests Kay Dean)
8. A cream or gel with aloe and vitamin E can help

Common reasons eyes can become puffy vary from crying, salt intake, heredity, fluid retention, to allergies.  Regardless of the reason, swollen eyes are no fun.  Good luck!!!

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Friends Help You Through Everything

Yesterday I lived through letting go of one of the dearest creatures who has shared my life.  I've never had to put an animal to sleep before and there were so many mixed emotions for me.  I drew great comfort from friends who understood my position and offered support.


So we were sitting in my living room, Stinky, my very intuitive friend, and myself, and she told me he was ready to go.  Now, this I already knew, but hearing it is tremendously validating and comforting.  I could tell by the way he looked at me it was time, and he loved me and wasn't scared.  She brought over lemon verbena leaves from her yard and made tea bags for Doug and myself for afterward, brought candles in a bowl she made, a lovely little box for a snippet of his fur and a whisker for me to keep, and an assortment of spices to throw on a fire to help him and us let him pass.

Before he left, my cat and I had a great day.  Stinky and I sat and sunned ourselves on the deck yesterday, I let him lick out my cereal bowl when I was done (his last supper) which is something I used to do when he was younger, and I held him as he slept much of the day yesterday.  The biggest pillar of all for me yesterday was my husband.  He came home with lily plants because Stinky used to eat them in our yard.  We will plant those next to his grave.  My biggest comfort is knowing Stinky was loved deeply by many.  He stole my husband's heart.

Knowing it's time and letting go are two very different things.  I know I will look for Stinky around the corner for a long time to come, he's been with me my entire adult life (18 years).  I shared many wonderful years with my sweet fuzz along with many amazing memories.  My wish?  That he come back in another cat to be mine again.

Huge thanks to those of you who offered your prayers and thoughts - even if you didn't tell me directly.

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Mary Oliver is an Inspiration to Me

Mary Oliver has a gift with words. This Pulitzer Prize winner and her dog are captured in a quiet moment to the right.

Following is a great poem of Ms. Oliver's:

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting--
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

~Mary Oliver

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Grief and Living

When a loved one exits my life, I am in turmoil. The History we built together cannot be replaced. They are no longer someone I can call, cry to, laugh with, and with whom I can build memories.

If you are unsure to seek out help to address grief, Rondi Lightmark, M.A. , offers "ten reasons why you might want to spend some time with a counselor:

1. You want to understand better about death and what happened to your loved one.

2. Your support system has moved on and you’re still struggling.
   

3. You can’t function, are losing sleep, crying every day, or having bad dreams.
   

4. Your health is breaking down.
   

5. You are filled with guilt and worry.
   

6. You have been having dreams or the sense that your loved one is near and wonder about life after death.
   

7. You are sad because you haven’t felt the presence of your loved one.
   

8. You need advice about how to help a grieving family member, a friend, or a child.
   

9. You feel angry, abandoned, or overwhelmed.
   

10. You want help figuring out how to share your experiences and find ways to integrate your loss through personal creativity."

If you feel a variety of healers might be appropriate for you, Guided Healing Journey is a local collective of healers that include working with a variety of healers who talk, touch, listen, and guide you through your solitude to help process grief. Getting Through Grief is an option to consider.

If you don't have resources to use healers, online resources might be an option. Journey of Hearts offers a variety of online grief resources.

Whatever your loss, please know support is everywhere.

Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin