Monday, December 26, 2011

'I Am Ready to Be a Parent' List

If 7 of 10 of these are true, you may be ready to be a parent.

1.  I don't really feel like I need time to myself.
2.  "Sleep?  Who needs sleep?" or "I can sleep when I'm dead" are thoughts I think often.
3.  I don't have to prove myself to anyone.
4.  I am in a loving supportive relationship and/or feel I have the resources to successfully raise a child.
5.  I don't get angry or freaked out often.
6.  I believe I can model good behavior for a child (all the time, not just in public).
7.  I have the humility to recognize when I need help and I ask for it BEFORE situations become hazardous or out of control.
8.  I'm okay with situations when I don't have the answers.
9.  I like being sick and taking care of others.
10.  The needs of others can be more important than my own needs most of the time (especially when infants or toddlers are in my care).

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Being a mom is F-ing hard.  Jeez, I can't even swear about it these days.  For Pete's sake!

I'm just now starting to comprehend the awe that I should have for my mother raising 3 children, the second birth being twins (of which I'm one)!  Egads.  In the past few weeks (which seem like a millennium) I have helped my daughter weather 2 vicious fevers (one is still one the outs), another tooth eruption, an allergic reaction to amoxicillin, and many sleepless nights for both of us.

Being alive with offspring means that my time is not mine anymore.  My time is hers first if she's ill because she needs me to take care of her.  Never did I really understand what that would mean in real life.  I used to fantasize about the type of mom I would want to be when that day came.  Well, that day's here and the type of mom I'm striving to be is kicking my butt.  Parenting is freaking hard - if you do it with your heart and soul.

I guess what I'm saying is if you're already a parent, bless you.  If you're thinking about becoming one, think long and hard - it's not all a bed of roses.  It's going to try your partnership, take away the spare time you ever thought you had, and many of the things you'd want to do socially just have to wait until your child's age allows it, or you can get enough sleep to have the energy to go out!

It may not be Mother's Day or Father's Day anytime soon, but I'm inspired to say thank you to the people who raised me.  It's a tough job!!!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Friday, October 28, 2011

Colds Stink

The tickle at the back of your throat... the itchy and watery eyes... the runny nose...  feeling worn down...  usually these symptoms all add up to a cold.  So what do you to weather the feeling bad, but not so bad that you stop your life and take a day off?  What if you have an audition?

Many swear by teas, echinacea, vitamin C, orange juice, plenty of liquids and chicken noodle soup.  Emergen-C is handy in my bag of wellness.  If you're able to get some doting on my your mom, all the more power to you!  Do you also use petroleum jelly on your nose to stop the red dry and achy feeling the skin around the nose gets from the constant wiping, dripping and blowing?  If you don't use that, what do you use?

And when I have to audition, I don't stop and give excuses.  If they can tell I'm sick, good for them.  If they can't and they just think I have a bit of a nasal quality, good for me.  Either way, I've done what I wanted to do which is to show up, do my best, and give myself another opportunity to work.

After all, when should a sneeze stop me from getting cast?

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Thursday, October 27, 2011

The Holidays...Already?

That was my first thought when I went to Home Depot the other day upon viewing rows of Christmas trees and October.  Really?  Am I just getting more weary because I'm older or is consumerism, in fact, becoming more pronounced?  Maybe both?  Either way, I started to think about how I want to spend the holidays this year.  Last year I was healing from having my little girl at home; I'll spare you the details.  This year, I am well and can celebrate the holidays with cheer.  But where should we celebrate as a family?

My first reaction was with my husband's family because they're within driving distance.  That was our plan.  But then my husband and I started to think about the travel hassles, how our little girl doesn't love to be still for long (let alone a five hour drive), and how we have weathered a hell of a year.  Our revised plan is to stay home and rest.

While I don't think this plan went over well with our family, it sure does make my heart feel cozy.  Holidays are for creating family traditions and celebrating the gifts we have enjoyed during the year.  My husband and I are new parents with a spectacular little girl!  What's not to celebrate?  We made it through the sleep deprivation and are now on our way to laughing often and looking at every day as a fun adventure rather than something to slog through.  Plus, I'm almost done with my Ph.D. coursework, something I never thought would actually come to pass.  I have one more semester and then it's just writing the dissertation.  Phew!  Then all I have to do is land a professorship!  :-D

No matter how you choose to celebrate your holidays this year, follow your heart.  Life has challenges - so make your heart happy the best you know how.  And if you happen to cringe when you see the rows of Christmas decorations at any given store, know that you're not alone.  Find your reason for the season!
Copywright 2011 Heather Corwin

Friday, October 7, 2011

Take Time to Connect

As artistic people, we need to take time- especially in an urban environment- to connect to other people in a meaningful and supportive way.  One simple way that we often overlook is resting WITH someone else.  The truth is, as animals we sleep more soundly knowing that someone is looking over or out for us.  So why not rest in a pack every now and then?

By resting with others, we give our over-stimulated nervous systems a chance to regulate and synch with others at a time when we're all calm.  When's the last time you felt truly calm with another?  What a cozy feeling!  If you're able to, choose a place that makes you all or both feel safe and good like the people in the image above lying on the deck by the water with a fuzzy friend keeping watch.  You might choose in front of a warming fire or on an inviting couch.

Even taking 10 minutes a day to rest with someone else can make a calming difference in your life.  Give it a try.  Isn't it a lovely thought to know that you can bring more joy into your life?

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Friday, September 2, 2011

Do Hormones Really Do Anything?

In a word: Yes.  First, the average male has 9 hormones where as the average female has 126.  No wonder women suffer from migraines more than men!  But that's not all.  What I'm learning first hand is mood swings and intense feelings after giving birth.  These fluctuating hormones make me feel like I have some sort of madness at times.

The intensity of feelings harkens back to the beginning of the time when my period started.  There's a great reason most teenage girls are portrayed as moody and bitchy.  During my time, I would feel on edge and vulnerable and not understand why. 

Well, now I know why and I'm annoyed that most of the time I'm doing damage control in my own mind.  For example, if the dishes are in the sink and dirty left by anyone else, I'm furious.  Seriously angry.  This anger is followed by a bafflement that anyone would be so selfish as to do something they know would annoy me.  Yeah.  Not fun to be in my head as this whirlwind of emotions swirl.

The healthy part of this present process is my ability to step back, take a breath, and realize that this too shall pass.  Sigh.  As I begin the process of slowing down and stopping breast feeding, I'm hoping my body doesn't offer me an all out riot of screaming hormones...  it will.  So until the storm passes, I thank all of you who have to sit it out with me. 

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Friday, August 12, 2011

Too Much On Your Plate?

I was having lunch today with a friend when I realized my life is so full it's over-flowing.  Most of the time I'm really proud that I'm managing to do all the things I am: Ph.D. student, new mom, new wife, private wellness practice (that's successful), teaching at 2 universities... and those are the main highlights.  But when is enough enough?

Doing this much means that I have created self-imposed anxiety.  That translates to lower tolerance for adapting to situations.  For example, going to out to eat with a friend and bringing my daughter is not so easy.  I have to factor in when she's going to eat, when she's going to get her nap, what she's acting like today, hope that I'm hungry but not starving by the time we eat, and hope she likes where we are.  Then I get to worry about if we're irritating the other patrons if she behaves like a baby and cries at all.  Sigh.  Going out makes me anxious instead of happy. 

Even if I wasn't doing all the things I'm doing, I do wonder if going out with my little girl would cause me as much anxiety.  I'm an introvert, after all.  But I know stress is taking its toll on my jolly attitude.  I'm not saying you have to be a parent to understand pressure, I'm wondering if it's just the one more thing that's gotten me close to my tolerance point.  Sigh.  I'm trying to get to the "I don't care, it's just life" attitude...but I do care.  When I do something, I like to enjoy it. Makes sense, right? 

Man.  Life can give challenges!  So I plan on being strategic and practice adaptability.  Plus, I need to get better at asking for help when I need it.  Phew.  If this resonates with you, please know you're not alone!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Find Your Edge

Practicing.  It's something you have to do to perfect anything.  Walking (at first), running, speaking, communicating, - everything.  So why are we so hard on ourselves when we don't get it right?  Why do we continually compare our progress with others instead of our own journey?  Oh, those loud judges in our minds keep us on our toes, don't they?

Today, for the first time since having my little girl, I was able to do some stretching that didn't hurt.  I was able to breathe, work out some kinks, and make my little girl giggle as I contorted into much needed stretches.  And I started thinking about how I could be mad at myself for not being in great shape after having a baby.  But then I remembered the great point my client made yesterday, "You listened to your body when you were pregnant.  You were gestating - and you're not 20.  You were doing your job."

I didn't come to that conclusion on my own.  However, what I take away from that is the truth that by listening to my body, I can decide to grow whatever it needs.  Now I can grow my flexibility and ease after a hiatus of growing a life.  That not only feels great framed that way, it is true.

Sometimes we move away from things that make us feel good for a reason.  We can either move toward something else that makes us feel good or we can beat ourselves up about it.  Eh.  I vote for move toward the good feeling stuff!!!  Life is too short.  It's all about PRACTICE anyway, not perfection!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Sunday, August 7, 2011


Sometimes it's just great to get away and breathe.  Living in an urban center makes that possibility remote and difficult - because there are usually people trying to be alone at the same time you are in the same places.  So what do you do to get to the quiet places filled with solitude?

In truth, I try to skip the country once every few years and make sure to hit a countryside.  When I'm really lucky, I'm able to go to Northern California with my husband - Trinidad.  It's quiet and reminds me of the coast of Scotland with it's jagged rocky shore and cool mists that ease the soul.  Plus, we have a special place there where he proposed to me - Fern Canyon.  It's amazing with the walls of ferns and herds of elk that stroll through the beachfront.  Just lovely. 

If I can't get to any of these places, I find refuge in a book.  Okay, I admit I'm a huge romance novel fan because, frankly, I enjoy the formula.  I like having a certain expectation of happiness in some of my reading.  The academic books will always be there, but that reading is not my refuge. 

Some of my favorite writers: Nora Roberts, Paulo Coehlo, Jude Devereaux, Jodi Picoult, Shakespeare, Clifford Odets, and Dan Siegel.

Who do you curl up to?  Man, I love that we are all blessed with imagination!  How do you use yours the most?  Happy resting!!!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Planting a Garden When It's HOT

I'm not a native Californian like my husband and daughter, I'm from the hard-working city of Chicago.  Life is very different here.  Here I can plant and play with plants all year round!  Now, Chicago is in the great planes and has wonderful soil for farming, but only in seasons when you don't freeze your eyeballs off.  In California, this introvert can enjoy warm breezes all year round.

So I started thinking about why I like to tend to my garden.  When I was little, my mother loved roses - but wasn't very good at keeping them.  She also loved to plant herbs.  I didn't always love helping her, but now I can't stay out of my garden!  This love had to come from somewhere.  Spending quality time alone thinking while my hands are busy making beauty is important to me.  I think that's another reason I love the healing arts (Rolfing and maternity massage).

I think of walking, gardening, playing cards, and intimate moments with my husband are the activities that help my mind stop reeling and get me back into the moment.  The latter is my favorite by far.  However, he's not always available.  Slow your world down and enjoy your garden.  Today is a great day to practice - strike now while it's HOT!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Just Say Sorry

Sometimes I screw up.  I know!  Hard to believe, huh?  You would think the hardest thing to do when that happens is accept the embarrassment or regret or whatever bad feeling erupts and move on.  Oh, no, I say it's apologizing if I did another person wrong.

Like most people, I don't like to make another person feel bad.  I know (usually) when I do make someone else feel bad, as an offended or taken aback face is not difficult to spot.  What can be challenging is the simple act of saying.  "Wow.  I really screwed up.  I'm sorry I did that.  I'm even more sorry I made you feel bad."

I did not used to excel at apologizing.  Over time, I've practiced and gotten really good at it.  I'm also good at not taking the blame when it's not mine to take.  Sometimes the blame game hinges on point of view, but that may be a topic for another reflection. 

All in all, I can say without a doubt that apologizing -- when I feel bad and another person feels bad -- makes me feel better immediately. Plus, we both feel relief that the conflict is over.  When I apolized to a friend today, she told me I'm good at saying I'm sorry.  That felt good to hear.  Why?  Who wants to be sorry when there's so much joy to be had in the world!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Wednesday, July 27, 2011


Well, it can consume us.  And not always for reasons that seem reasonable.  For example, sometimes we feel guilty (or are made to feel guilty) if we do not anticipate the needs of another.  In truth, the other person is responsible for getting her own needs met, which means she needs to speak her needs to have those needs be acknowledged and, ideally, met.  Nobody can read minds.

So why does guilt come into the picture?  Sometimes I honestly believe of myself that I should be able to read minds.  As if that were possible!  That's what's known as "magical thinking."  Circumstances are always going to be evolving and changing in life which also means all situations will be different, even if those situations have similar events involved.  Why is that important?  Because every moment is a new moment and can have new outcomes.

I don't have to beat myself up for not being omniscient.  Puh-lease!  What I do have to do is be gentle with myself and do the best I can in any situation.  I tend to dwell on things that I can't change and feel guilty about some of those things.  An example is I want a vacation to Italy, which also makes me feel guilty for wanting to take a break from my great life.  I'm not even going to do this vacation - but the very act of thinking about it makes me feel guilty.  Stupid, huh?

Well, guilt be GONE!  I'm going to enjoy my imagination, my wants, my desires, and know that I won't get all of them.  I will also work on being gentle with myself when it comes to magical thinking.  This trap is a tough one for me and one that I continually work on.  Most of all, I will use my sense of humor as often as possible to not make moments monumentally important that don't need to be.  Sigh.  One day at a time!!!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Sit Up and Take Notice

As I was walking with my little girl this morning, I noticed how she was taking in the world.  For the first time since we've been walking, she sat up in the stroller as we walked.  Now, some of the reason is because we just graduated to a bigger and more supportive stroller, but I attribute most of her sitting up to her curiosity about the world around her, much like the little girl in the photo to the right.

So often we walk through the world and don't take in the simple things around us like the birds chirping, the wind on our face, the smell of the fresh morning...  As your summer comes to a broil, I invite you to take in the wonderful sensations around you.  I don't know what your favorite things are, but mine are the crispness of L.A. mornings (ah, the desert!), hot chai tea warming my belly, my husband's embrace, and my little girl's giggle.

As life evolves, your favorite things list may grow or change.  That's life.  Take notice and see what your favorite things are today that may be different from about 5 years ago.  What has stayed on your "favorite things" list?  Revel in the fact that you're a more evolved you than before - and you're still YOU.

Happy Sunday!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Friday, June 17, 2011

What I May Never Tell My Daughter

Parenting is tough.  Most of us do what our parents did because they are our only role model of how to parent.  But what I grapple with is how to recognize the signs of what's happening in the room.  To be honest, I learn how to have fun and interact with my daughter the best from other people.  Yesterday, I was witness to a friend showing her the simplest things, talking to her in a secretive low voice, and her delight was palpable.  I forgot how to play with her - and he reminded me.

Which makes me think of how I treat all the people I love most in this world.  Sometimes I get stuck in a rut and I want to "get it right."  Well, that's not only un-fun, it's impossible.  People make mistakes.  All the time.  All. The. Time.  What makes us good people is how we recover from those mistakes with our loved ones.  There are times when I just mess up.  You too?

Well, what I don't want to tell my daughter is I will mess it up much of the time.  I will do the best I can, and sometimes that won't feel like enough.  A little part of me quivers and feels deep sadness that I won't always be the great mom I strive to be - because I am not made of magic.  I'm not a mind-reader.  This tendency for perfection is also known as magical thinking.  I wish to God I was made of magic!  When I hear her cry I eagerly want to soothe her soul and make her smile.  But...  that's not the part of learning that I can do with her. 

Learning is frustrating.  It can sometimes suck.  But when she succeeds in her quest and overcomes things like not being able to put herself to sleep, and now she can, she gains confidence in her abilities and I can cheer her on from the sidelines.  It's hard, but that's my job.  And that's my life now.  Oh, how things change! 

I love you little love!  That I will be sure to tell her every step of the way.

Copywright 2011 Heather Corwin

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Sweet Dreams

When you were little, did you dream about becoming something big?  Something you knew people would love you for and you would rule the world?  Well, my friend, you are not alone!  But when do these dreams get derailed?

Are you in a job you want?  Do you hear all the time, "be grateful you have a job!" or "in this economy, you should...(whatever)."  Well, I'm here to tell you that small thinking will not make your heart happy.  If you are not enjoying your life, YOU need to change it.  You don't have to quit your job today and start hunting for another job - you can create a plan and move forward through steps to make that plan come to life - your life!

Change is often stressful, even when it's the change we crave.  To minimize the stress, the steps you devise can aid your transformation into the life you choose.  Don't let life pass you by thinking, "wow, I wish I would have done that" or "jeez, I always wanted to ....  but just never thought I could."  You CAN. 

Do it!  Do it NOW while you still can!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Casting Insider Offers Advice on Nailing Your Audition

Jason is a good friend of mine from College. He knows his stuff and is a delightful person.
This is a good read....
Casting Insider Offers Advice on Nailing Your Audition

Monday, May 30, 2011

Swearing...I Can't as a Mom

Well, hell.  I love swearing.  Though I'm considering giving it up because I am a new mom.  However, I reserve the right to use strong language as a professor (sometimes swearing helps me make a point when teaching acting).  Muthafuckah!  Okay, I don't usually use that one or G.D.  Jeez, the last time I used G.D. was when I was in my twenties, I had moved to Nashville, and cussed in a supermarket near an old craggy woman -- who clutched her chest at my profanity.  I thought I almost killed her.  That was the last time I carelessly let that swear word fly.

Strong language is so odd, isn't it?  We give power to a series of sounds that can be offensive to some and like old friends to others.  I remember fondly getting used to saying the word "hell."  I was in girl scouts, in 8th grade, and at a dude ranch retreat with some of my closest friends.  I said "hell" every other word.  I felt like I was all powerful and an adult, a heady feeling. Please note Lady Pac Man was the big new thing at this time.

I like swearing.  I like the way it tastes in my mouth.  I like the way it sounds.  I like that when I swear it's usually playfully - not out of anger.  I like that if I hurt myself on something I have a great word to accompany my anguish.  I like that when I swear you can tell I'm from Chicago.  Sigh.  Well...I guess I'm going to have to come up with my own renditions of strong language as a mom.  Boy, I already miss the F bomb cracking from my lips... Perhaps I shall defer to the classic expletive in GHOST BUSTERS: "mother puss bucket!"

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Looks Can Be Deceiving

There are times when I look at a part of my life or a piece of my life and how it's working and it looks to me like it's I want to chuck it - throw it away and make room for more...whatever.  Just the other day, I was about to toss what looked to be a dead plant into the compost; I forgot.  Today I walk out to my garden and that very plant is sprouting and has it's first bloom on it.  I didn't know it was a perennial!

Which got me to thinking that I might be quick to throw things out if they don't seem to be working.  Now sometimes things just need to be thrown out, re-gifted, or donated to the local charity - and sometimes that's the best choice.  I'm not talking about those times.  I'm talking about the times that I have no patience to learn the lesson of the dormant plant.  What's the living truth inside the seemingly ugly exterior?

Am I being too metaphorical?  Perhaps.  But in every day's lessons lives the beauty and splendor of life.  I have to take it where I can get it! 

Where are your life's ugly truths that make your life an unexpected treasure?

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin, photo credit: Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Asking for HELP

There are times in your life when you can't do it all - even if you wanted to!  Asking for help can be a challenge, but a lesson that all who are wise need to embrace.  It takes a village, right?  I'm also including all of us who are people, not just parents, not just children...people.

When I was growing up I loved when a person I loved recognized I needed help without my asking for it.  The offer of help was such a relief!  As an adult, the offers are more rare - especially because I WANT to be able to do it all and others sense this in me so they don't offer.  I still cry with relief when my husband sees I'm at my wits end and need some help - and he offers silently and without judgement.

However, no one can read my mind.  It's up to me to speak my needs and tell others when I need help.  I was pleasantly surprised at the positive responses I received from family and friends who came to my rescue...because I asked and I received!

When is the last time you asked for what you needed?  You just might get it!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

How Do You Connect With Family Who Lives Far Away?

In this day and age of computers, we have many more options than snail mail to connect with others.  The communication can take all sorts of forms, depending mostly on the computer savvy of the people interested in communicating with each other.

Skype.  You and family or friends can set up a free account with Skype that allows free international phone calls along with the capapbility to use a webcam so you can see each other as you talk.  This is especially fun with new babies who can't talk - but family can see the little cherub!

Flip Camera. This little handy camera is this generation's version of the home movie camera.  It's great for short movies or little one-sided excerpts from life that you can share through YouTube.  Very fun!

Email.  Not as personal and possibly not as exciting as receiving snail mail, but fast and convenient!  This is the most popular form of contemporary communication - perhaps even beating out texting (which many family members don't enjoy) as well as the telephone!

If you have a way you like to communicate with your family that isn't listed, feel free to add your suggestions!  The world gets smaller every day and keeping in touch with loved ones makes everyone's world a better place.

 Copyright 2010 Heather Corwin

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Nothing Sweeter than a Smile

I was blown away by the power of another person seeing me and, as a result, that person's face lit up like I was her first Christmas tree!  I don't think there's a better feeling in the world than the transformation I witness in another: exuberance at my entrance!  (This isn't just about my little girl giggling and wriggling at my appearance, it also happens with good friends.)

I'm human.  I want people to like me.  When people I like really like me too, that feels GREAT.  I've learned over the years that I have to wait to decide if I want a person to be a friend.  Sadly, I've experienced rejection if I seem too enthusiastic about a person before they have decided they like me.  Don't you remember those "friends" who jilted you in grade school?  Well, sometimes it still happens as adults, but we learn to bury the feelings faster and more efficiently.

Well, today I want you to remember that you can deeply effect someone's day.  Remember what a smile can do for someone else.  You don't have to jump up and down when you see her or break into giggles, but a little grin can give you both joy that keeps you both smiling throughout the day!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Getting Older is Cool

This weekend was delightful for me because I was able to see three amazing women who I had not seen in MONTHS - one of the three I had not seen in two years.  How great it is that I have friends who I like enough - and who like me enough - to reconnect even after time and life has intervened!?  Yep, I'm a lucky gal.

What's even cooler, (dare I say magical?), about these relationships is I feel as if we never stopped talking in the interim.  You know these people!  You pick up right where you left off.  These are good people!

Just when I think I'm alone in this world and have to suck it up and do it all myself (makes me tired just to think about life that way!), up pops some terrific friends to remind me I'm not alone.  I have shoulders, and babysitters, and strong women to count on. Thank you ladies!  You know who you are! 

Take a moment to reach out to someone today who you haven't spoken with in a while.  He or she will be glad you did!

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Childhood Sighs

You know how when you make your bed with fresh linens (maybe you even hung them outside to dry!) and you take your shower (or bath!) before you go to bed in your clean sheets...and you just feel so cozy and clean?  I love that feeling!  Another feeling I love is when I am talking to my husband and he is listening to me closely.  I know he's listening because he makes a comment that sums up my story perfectly.  He's great like that.

On the other hand when I was growing up, I often felt like I was not heard.  I don't know if some of that is because I am a twin or because my mom was not good at multitasking, or whatever, I just know that's how I felt.  As I'm going through the world, I'm thinking about the way I remember being as a child and I want to address and conquer, if I can, the problems I faced as a child.

One way for me to do that is to have ONE child.  I know many people might believe the old stigma (that was disproven scientifically) that only children are spoiled.  Well, if a child whose needs are met is spoiled, I am IN!  I want my little girl to be heard.  I don't want to split my focus.  I don't want her to feel like an afterthought.  I don't want her to have the theme in her life am I enough? I do.

Parenting is not a perfect art - neither is being a wife and friend.  But, I want to do the best job I know how with the tools I have.  And that means I'm having one child.  As a choice.

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Finding Time to Do What You Love

So often the end of the day is here and I think to myself, "Where did the day go?"  Well, that's not ideal for me.  I like to feel I've accomplished something, if even a small goal for the day.  But is the problem a matter of time, priorities, or support from others to meet my needs?

You know I'm a new mom, so having time for me just became more precious than ever.  As an introvert, I recharge by spending time alone.  Granted, that time will look different now, but it's still time I need to feel good.  So I started to think about the time I am actually alone in the day.  These times tend to be in the bathroom.

What I'm finding myself doing in my daily morning shower is a ritual.  I look out my window at my garden, take restful and cleansing breaths, and list the things I'm thankful for in my life.  After those brief moments, I think of a goal I want to set for my day.  It might even be as simple as to make a chai tea and sit for 5 minutes alone.  I might add something like I want to make my husband and little girl smile at least 5 times today.  This is a great beginning to reclaiming time for me.  As time goes on and I get better at being a mom, I feel confident more time will come for me.

No matter how full my life is, I need to find the time and energy to rejuvenate.  As I recreate my life as the mother in a family AND being the me prior to being a mom, I need to bring with me the elements of my life that are most important. 

Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Great Baby Shower Gift Ideas

  1.  Graco Sweet Slumber Sound Machine - it even has an iPod jack!  CeCee loves the heartbeat option.
  2.  Bright Starts Kashmir Ingenuity Full Size Swing
  3. Zonk Designs Snoozerpedic SPMD2000 Big Curve Ergonomic Full Body Pillow for feeding baby 
  4. bumGenius 4.0 One Size Pocket Cloth Diapers Pack of 12 if you are going to do cloth diapers
  5.  Heel - Calendula Ointment
  6. Any Pack and Play you like!
  7. Snap N Go stroller (you have to buy a car seat - but baby stays in seat and goes from car to stroller in a click!)
  8. The book Parenting From The Inside Out by Dan Siegel and Mary Hartzell
  9. Anything you know the parent loves for the PARENT.  Moms and Dads tend to be sleep deprived the first few months and anything that can help center or ground the parent is GOOD.
  10. FOOD coupons.  What is better is you make up a bunch of food, freeze it, and bring it over for the couple so they don't have to make food.  Making food seems like a feat after surviving a night of feedings - often an insurmountable feat.  You will be SO appreciated for this!!!!
Copyright 2011 Heather Corwin